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Should
Money be the First Topic of Conversation After You Get
Engaged? |
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Robbi Ernst III, President/Founder Website: www.junewedding.com Email robbi@junewedding.com |
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You've got your ring, and you are
officially engaged. You are as excited as you can
possibly be. You have met your one true love and expect
to spend the rest of your lives together. BUT, did you
know that an engagement ring isn't a gift to keep ....
legally in the United States of America, it is considered
an "anticipated gift".... in other
words, it doesn't really become yours until the marriage
contract is signed. And, in the summer of 1997 US courts
upheld this as a legal statute. In other words, it has
become law. Until then it was merely "custom' that
if the groom called off the wedding, the bride got to
keep the ring; if the bride called off the wedding, the
ring was returned to the groom. But now the courts of law
have intervened. If this isn't enough to upset the ring
bearer's pillow, get ready for other important factors
that can make or break your wedding day. For years
wedding magazines and books refused to write about
realities in planing a wedding. They felt that talking
about money and costs to put on a wedding would detract
from the dreamy fantasies that a lady has in thinking
about her wedding. That has changed. Today's contemporary
wedding periodicals and books are more realistic and thus
provide a greater service to the consumer in the sense
that they are writing about budgets and costs.
But, they still are not writing about realistic costs.
They are taking averages of costs of weddings that might
involve pot-luck in a town with a population of 5,000
people and averaging that with the cost of a wedding in a
fancy-smantsy city like San Francisco or Chicago or New
York. Most magazines and books state that the average
wedding in the USA costs about $ 17,000 for 125 - 150
people. Actually, the more accurate amount is closer to $
25,000 to $ 35,000. So, let's talk about money and
realism, because it should be the first topic of
conversation after the happy tears of new a engagement
dry up. When
beginning to plan a wedding, sit down with your fiancée
and talk about the wedding you want, the wedding of your
dreams, the wedding that will relate to your friends and
relatives who you are and what you are becoming. Make a
list of categories that are necessary for a wedding
(ceremony and reception sites, florist, photographer,
cake, etc.... Beside each category, write out what you
want to have. Next to that make three columns: the first
column (label this column "Budget") is what you
think you are able to spend in each category. The second
column will be what we call "Realistic Costs"
and a third column labeled "Actual Costs..... and
we'll come back to these below. Add up the first column. |
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